This was actually March but screw it.
OMGGGGGGGGGG BERTHA!! She WAS such a drama queen. We called her Wandering Waterbear because you canāt kill a waterbearā¦so we foolishly thought.
lemme tell you the hellscape of this camperā¦strap inā¦because itās a dumpster fire from start to finish.
Inherited it. We knew it wasnāt anything special but we wanted a super low cost way to travel during the pandemic. We THOUGHT this was an answer. Put in something like $3k and have something to tool around for a year and visit all the parksā¦take it out for long bits because husband can work from homeā¦oh how foolishly stupid one can be when full of dreams creativity and a budget.
So Iām not sure if you read but we had substantial damage from the freeze. Our entire world is upside downā¦keep that in mind.
Here we go.
House freezes and we no longer have walls or a floor or a semblance of sanity.
Rip out walls/get into emergency stay at a one room hotel.
I had preplanned a camping trip at Possum kingdom state park about a half a year ago with @kpblitzen42 family - up from Austin and down from Wichita Falls. We talk and decided to just YOLO it. It coincides with the moving out of the hotel and the moving into our longer-term-yet-still-short-term apartment in the sky. We arenāt ready but letās just go anywaysā¦we need a break and itās going to be a beautiful weekendā¦letās freaking go!
Thatās the start of the movie.
We begin our driveā¦no waitā¦the slide out is broken. Kenneth needs to JACK the slide out in and out and we need to physically push it from the outside to get it back on track. Well that was fun and only took us a few hours to do. Keep in mind this entire time Iām moving the āto be doneā stuff into the RV boxes that have been moved around from the freeze were chunking into the RV. Everything EVERY SINGLE thing in the house has been moved around/shifted to the garage or possibly upstairsā¦stuff everywhere.
We begin our drive a bit later than anticipated. Why does this matter?
Well Iāll tell youā¦when the lights are on some alarm we couldnāt figure out continually rang as we drove. So Kenneth in the RV is just listening to a beeeeeeeeeeeeee for hours. We stopped for earplugs. We get to the state park hours after we anticipated because we find the thing canāt move above 45mph but weāre checked inā¦ahhhh nature so calming.
This is the face of a man whoās blood pressure is sky high from stress but heās still smiling because his soul is one of pure beautifulness.
Kenneths mother and aunt are already at the park. Comfortable and all sorts of prepared. We are rolling in like three deranged crackheads. We hookup the waterā¦the hot water heater explodes. Water spills out everywhere. EVERYWHERE. We stop the water. Cussing. Lots of cussing. Knees in the water.
Keep in mind we are already exhausted.
We go to setup to sleepā¦we need to still assemble my sons futon. All of this was on the to-do list. PS so excited about this futonā¦itās a wonderful mustard colorā¦so cool but we just didnāt get it put togetherā¦you knowā¦because our life went to hell. Iām almost in tears trying to follow the simplest of instructions because Iām already hating this decision. I donāt need stress. I need an all inclusive vacation and a beach! It would have been cheaper and easier at this point.
I forgot the box with all the draperyā¦we have no drapesā¦holy crap Iām an idiot. Kenneth didnāt pack foodā¦weāre going to die.
Middle of the night it starts raining and the roof leaksā¦you know whatā¦screw it. Neighbors move in with two MASSIVE dogsā¦and guess what? They barked the ENTIRE night. Now people get dramatic about that but Iām telling you two three hundred fifty pound dogs barked every five minutes for 12 hours.
Not badā¦we found a camp storeā¦eggs and hotdogsā¦$15ā¦whatever we will live. We can hunt for a duck or something. Letās get into natureā¦letās do the nature thing. Letās build a fire!
Fire, tent building, laughingā¦omg look at this weāre campingā¦weāre being a familyā¦my god we are succeeding! We got this.
I hear somethingā¦is that water? I think thats waterā¦
The toilet overflowedā¦not even in a cute way. It overflowed so much that water came out the bumper. Pee water out of my bumper the leftover carpet is soaked. Squishy. Cussing. Cussing. Cussing. We can do this. Weāre doing family stuffā¦this will all be a cute story someday. Look at us roasting hotdogs. Look the lakeā¦dammmmnit letās freaking bond! Donāt think about the piss carpetā¦donāt think about the piss carpet.
Not a picture of a broken manā¦but a āIām on the edgeā man note the hairā¦the hair is an indicator of his internal sense of being.
We get up. this sucks. this really sucks. Letās go buy a nice RV and really just enjoy ourselves. Letās just freaking go.
Iām in the truck. Kenneth is in the RV. Kenneth guns it and I tell the people at the checkin. Ayden and I drive and drive and drive and we just donāt see him. Itās been at least 30minutes and I donāt see him. Try to call. No cell phones. Ok Ayden watch the phone and when you can call please do. We call no answer. Call again. Nothing. Call family.
He had a flat. Heās ok.
Heās callingā¦ rudely hang up on family.
He says he went āthe way google wanted him to goā well what the hell does that mean? Send me your location. I donāt have a location. Kenneth ya you do. Send me an address. Iām on a FM road. OMGGGGGG. It takes me an hour to find this man. and when I do I find him like this.
And I thinkā¦heās dead. But no. Heās not, he canāt get the spare down, he canāt get the tire off, he canāt do anything and we donāt have the proper tools to do anything. Heās been trying for TWO HOURS to make anything budge. Did I ever mention I married a saint of a man? I did heās amazing. Seriously almost angelic. He smiles when he sees me. Covered in sweat dirt and grease, raging headache and he smiles and kisses me. Swooning doesnāt even cover it he has my heart and soul for life. Water pours out of the RV when we jack it up. Water, in my sons grandmothers traditional way of life, symbolizes a disrespect of your financesā¦thanks grandma.
We joke about setting fire to it and walking away. He jokes. Iām serious.
A man comes from nowhere. Not a man. Jesus embodied as an air conditioner repair man. He has a pneumatic hammer driver with the proper fittings, together they have the strength (after another hour) to get the tire off and shift another tire. Back on the road. The saint of man says āIām going to follow you into town just incaseā
we driveā¦30mphā¦all is wellā¦get into tiny townā¦I hear a gunshotā¦see Kenneth turn into Walmart and stop in the entranceā¦what the heckā¦he jumps out of the RVā¦the RV is dead. Againā¦out of nowhereā¦someone comes and says āI got chainsā and DRAGS us to a corner of Walmart.
Here are the heres of the day.
DEAD. DEAD. DEAD. We have no idea whatās going on. Itās Sunday Kenneth needs to work in the morning. We talk to Walmart and tell them if this thing bursts into flames wait awhile before calling the fire department please and thank you.
I put it on craigslist and also the local Facebook group. We have a few bites but not much because Iām honest about the condition in the listing. Someone calls us and tells us if we donāt get any offers he would be willing to low-ball us a realistic number. Ok, I admire the honesty. We get stood up twice and the low-baller comes out driving this sucker
and a hero offers us a truly lowball offer says he will let us tour his place. What place? Well, the awesome possum. Awesome. Possum. Let that sink in. Itās a makerspace for people in āvan lifeā tons of people living out in the middle of nowhere all building together. Very burning man but with pants.
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We shake hands and go out to dairy queen to celebrate. We went and visited his setup and its truly amazing and made of people from every corner of the world.
Ugh. Shit show. Start to finish. But a fun finish.